uneasiness...in my chest...tts hw i felt...some form of anguish i think...
will you feel if ur grp of frens ps you...they tell you to do one thing while they do another...
what if they claimed its a last minute decision...why didnt they inform you abt it? did they did it on purpose? they do not want you to tag along?
if you tell them no matter what they do you just do with them....as a whole...but its like...the group feels better of without you...whatever they enjoy...the jokes laughters stories...you will now feel left out...more left out than before...
i vividly rmb how left out i was...the front grp of boys talking abt dota...back grp of guys talking abt their famine camp...i wasnt in any of these grps...i walked alone...in the middle...very dramatic...like filming some stupid emo films...but yea its true...
they treat you as dirt...they treat u as a joke...when you sincerely treated them as frens...
some arrogant guy was like commenting on a girl...talking abt her figure when we were watching some movie...then i joined in...then for no reasons he hurdled some personal attacks on me...duno whats his problem...stupid fat blob...
it will defnitely sear a hole in your heart...leaving an injury which eventually leaves a scar behind as time passes...
when they talk abt common topic...they laugh...the whole grp understands and laugh abt it...but you dont understand a single thing...you cant even smile at it...you may even frown or feel tearful cos you cant fit into their conversation...
the outing...few hours from now...they invited me...i tink its just becos i complained abt being left out from their activity the previous time and they just wanna save their ears from the whiny complaints...
i just hope life gets better...2009...isnt a good year for me...everything went wrong...studies...frens...money...cca...soccer...its seriously the worst...and arsnal just lost their lead to burnley after burnley scored a penalty....
soccer went terribly wrong too...even syarif realised tt...he was like:"rmb tt time you solo past everyone then you score...you can do it man..." but now...i cant even pass...i think i had exhausted my luck for the past 17 years...lets hope the 18th year will be the worst year ever...let all unlucky events happen at one shot...and allow lady luck to shine on me once again from 2010 onwards...
i just want them to noe tt...since they hate me so much...just tell me...don nid to be hypocrites...no nid to do whatever they had done for post prom...buddies in the past, acquaintance today....
anyways...just submitted resume for some part time jobs...and irvin tan so retarded...he dun have resume so he took mine as the backbone structure of his resume and reconstructed one of his own...haha...thanks ms raudah for preparing us for post a levels life...forcing us to make a resume and resume letter...phew...
then bloody hell...the links arent working...cant buffer arsenal match now...tink i will get some sleep for now...or just continue watching till full time...
